Break

The mid semester break is just around the corner. I cannot help but feel so excited about it. It has been quite a while since I gone back home, and I have always missed all the things in my hometown. The most apparent is the scent of the air; it’s really different if I take a whiff here compared to that in Terengganu. Here is a bit soggy, but concentrated with the sharp ‘fragrance’ of chemicals lingering in the air. Terengganu’s? It’s like you are living in a big inhaler.

There’s only one paper left, and I’m putting all my efforts to secure an A for that subject. An A can dramatically change your CGPA, and I need to boost my CGPA as soon as possible. There’s no much time left. Time and tides wait for no man, they say. I’ll be the one who will ride on the surface of the rough rolling waves and emerge as a survivor. Well..I need a raft then.Hm

2 a.m. in the morning

It’s already 2 a.m. in the morning and I still could not sleep. There are too many things which keep charging strains in my head. I think about many things; about how many things have changed, and some of them which I didn’t want to be changed, well at least, not too drastically. I’ve been observing some people whom I thought important in my life. I somehow could not resist but to allow them to persist with what they were doing. Sometimes I feel remorse flowing inside me when I saw and kept cursing on how dumb they were. It’s not my fault after all. I did lash them with some appropriate advice.* long sigh*

It's Raining

The weather is cold outside. The rain has fallen again. I love rain. I love the feeling when it is raining. The smell, the chilly yet temperate sensation that you get when the rain comes down. 

Good grades, anyone?

My father said this: your examination result slip is a good fortune teller; it can tell you whether you will have an easy run along a clear highway or you have to pass through a muddy road which has potholes. Well, it’s quite true sometimes. I believe outstanding examination results are one of those stepping stones that human use to boost themselves and fly higher to extent which they can find complacency.

“Good grades don’t reflect true wisdom”. Yes. That might be true. One’s intelligence and insight cannot be measured only by using grades or whatsoever.  This argument is fine actually, but not ephemeral. One can be rebutted very easily when he or she uses this kind of statement. Why? The process of achieving excellence in the examination should have initiated from the very first place of human soul: motivation. And where does motivation come from? It’s your wisdom. The wisdom is the very essence which channels the motivation to your physical body to act accordingly to enjoin what is good for you and to shy away from evil.

So, I don’t really get along with people who hold with that idea. GOOD GRADES DO REFLECT TRUE WISDOM.

What Goes Up Must Come Down

What goes up must come down. That’s Murphy’s Law. It applies virtually to everything. We take a ball, for example, we throw the ball upwards into the air, and naturally it will come down due to the presence of gravitational force. It would be an out-of-the-world experience to watch a ball floating in the air without any physical support, except you have an invisible man holding the ball there.

What goes up must come down. People go through ups and downs. It is the shitty reality in living in this real-time temporal dwelling place. Nobody can say he or she can stay in the realm of his or her heyday forever. Nobody. There are times we breath in the air of triumph triumphantly, and there are those times when we are suffocated, succumbed by our own existence in this tiny little planet. That’s life. Life is not always a bed of roses after all. Life is real, life is hard. Sometimes, life is death.

Menanti Sebuah Katarsis

                Tragedi yang menimpaku kira- kira dua tahun yang sudah masih lagi segar dalam benakku. Lutut kananku merakam duka yang telah berkali-kali cuba aku padam namun apakan daya, bekas terjahan maut dari sisi itu tidak mampu untuk hilang dalam sekelip mata.

                 Dendam? Tidak. Aku langsung tidak menaruh sebarang kesumat terhadap sesiapa atas apa yang berlaku, walau sekelumit. Bukannya mahu dihambur pujian, tetapi aku percaya membiarkan dendam bersarang dalam lubuk kalbu merupakan satu pilihan salah yang mungkin meracun imanku.

                Sesekali ada juga bertandang amarah membakar emosiku. Dari mana datangnya, aku pun tak tahu. Mungkin dari sakitnya pedih yang aku rasai, atau mungkin sakit itu datangnya dari hati? Ah. Jangan difikir dalam-dalam. Makin celaru aku jadinya nanti. Persoalan bila lutut aku akan pulih merejam- rejam mindaku yang buntu tanpa kepastian. Aku tak mahu jadi cacat sampai mati. Aku kepingin benar untuk melangkah masuk ke padang dengan zat dan bentukku yang semutlak- mutlaknya, dengan kudrat dan kemampuanku semaksimumnya diolah dan diterjemahkan menjadi satu maha karya, kalau boleh dan diizinkan.

             

              Bola sepak merupakan hidupku. Bagi orang lain, benda itu tidak lebih daripada sebiji bola bodoh yang disepak- sepak. Jadi mungkin pada pemahaman mereka, kes seorang manusia dewasa yang tidak mampu untuk bermain bola hanya satu perbincangan yang trivial dan kecil. Ya. Kecil bagi mereka, tapi tidak pada aku. Bola kecil yang bodoh tu kandung makna satu dunia untuk aku. Aku membesar dengan bola sepak, dan aku nak terus tua dengan bola sepak.

                Si Lutut Kanan masih lagi tidak menampakkan tanda- tanda untuk keluar dari zon rehat yang panjang, malah bertambah teruk. Pedihnya makin pekat. Salah aku juga. Terlebih guna. Kini, aku ke kelas setiap hari terhincut- hincut. Rutin harian makin sukar tanpa sebelah kaki yang sempurna. Aku mengecap perepeteia dan anagnorisis yang dianugerahkan oleh Tuhan dengan hati yang lapang dan terbuka. Sambil itu, aku tertanya- tanya bila agaknya katarsis untuk tragedi ini akan datang menjelma.  Bila ya?

If I Were A Ninja

I’ve been admiring men in suits and costumes, especially the ones which usually appear in animes and superhero movies or even super sentais  - say it Spider-Man, Batman, Kamen Rider and many more to be named.

 To tell you the truth, I’m just so caught up, attracted, amazed, amused, mesmerized, astonished, vaccinated with characters whose outfits are designed to be equipped with masks and armours. Every moment seeing a superhero costumes or the likes will always dose me with undescribed enthralment.  It is most likely that I got this enthusiasm from my father, who is quite into ninjas.

Ninja, obviously, is from Japan. I have always been fantasizing what it would be like to be a ninja since I was a child; learning to master special uncanny jutsus, equipped with cool gadgets and weapons(kunai and shuriken), as well as the awing fighting techniques.

If I were a ninja, there are several things that I wish I can do. Firstly, it would be delightful to move as fast as lightning without anyone noticing. You see, there’s a lot that can be done when you have the ability to move fast; you can win in any race, you shall be entitled the speed demon in your football team, chasing an escaping thief, or somewhat represent your country in the internationals. How fun it could be when you have the power of speed spinning within your legs.

If I were a ninja, I think I should also consider holding a professional personnel security business. It’s quite easy. Someone shall hire me for his security within a stipulated period, and covering an accorded task. I think this kind of job can give me a living, though I have to face death every time I’m at work. Despite the challenges I might encounter, it should be fun—taking out the bad guys, saving some civilians as well as stabbing some rogues straight through their ribs.

If I were a ninja, I will cheat in exams, yeah, I know, you will do the same thing. Possessing special chameleon jutsu, access to the teacher’s or lecturer’s office will not be a problem. Without any doubt, I shall copy or take a look at the answers beforehand. Clone jutsu is a suitable technique to pass with flying colours.

If I were a ninja, I would like to use any jutsu that can send me flying high in the sky. I always crave to bathe in the sea of puffy clouds, and at the same time savour the moment of looking down to all people on the earth below.

If I were a ninja....ah, forget it. As if it’s gonna happen.